"Let not those whose hope is in you be put put to shame because of me."
Have you ever noticed that people outside the church are better christians than those inside? My own brother doesn't make much of a deal about religion. But he is a much more generous, compassionate and loving man than I am. He is a better human being.
I spent many years (20 as a pastor) in a tradition that talked about sin A LOT. But our discussion of sin was warped. It wasn't human enough. It's not that they didn't believe that were were all made in the image of God and had dignity, it's just that there was a constant drumbeat in the background- "total depravity"- which made it hard to hear other ideas. On paper this doctrine makes sense. But as it is lived out it's a killer.
"Sometimes ideas hold us down; they become heavy anchors that hold the boat of identity fixated in shallow, dead water. In the Western tradition the idea of sinfulness and self-ishness of the self has trapped many lovely people all their lives in a false, inner civil war. Fearful of valuing themselves in any way, they have shunned their own light and mystery. Their inner world remained permanently off limits. People were given to believe that they were naturally bad and sinful. They let this toxic idea into their minds and it gradually poisoned their whole way of seeing themselves. Sin was around every corner, and in any case, probable damnation waited at the end of the road. People were unwittingly drafted in blaspheming against their own nature. You could not let yourself go. Any longing to claim your nature or pursue your wildness would lead to ruin. This corrupted the innocence of people's sensual life and broke the fluency of their souls...you were made to feel like a convict trapped between guilt and fear. It is one of the awful sins committed against people. So many good people were internally colonized with a poisonous ideology that had nothing to do with the kind gentleness and tender sympathy of God." (J O'D)
Some come from traditions where that sin drum isn't banged so loudly, so this discussion may feel odd. But because I have that drum thumping away in my head, I have to process the idea of "sin", if only to hear other thoughts, and perhaps just get the percussion section to take a less prominent place in the symphony.
"Let not those whose hope is in you be put to shame because of me..."
Sin is a christian idea. The concept of "depravity" is that sin is everywhere. Henri Noewen says that "something dark has attached itself to the underside of my virtue." I can definitely see that, and understand that the ensuing sense of "woe is me" makes sense of what we refer to as "the gospel". The antidote to this woe is the message and reality of the free grace of God which comes with pardon and forgiveness. Guess what. God really does like you. This is the message that has freed millions from being shackled to guilt. It has freed me and been my comfort for years. It is beautiful.
But somehow we re-shackle ourselves and others. A counselor once said that we shouldn't be thinking about sin's guilt, but rather its impact. Cornelius Plantinga defines sin by saying that "things are not what they are supposed to be." It's one thing to talk about the guilt of sin and get trapped there. It's another to talk about its reality- its impact on the world and on us. This reality is what we wake up to and go to sleep under every day. If I understand the gospel clearly, it is proclaiming that the guilt part is over, so get over it. Now we are free to get about the business, full of hope, of reversing what ought not to be. Forgiveness of sins answers the celestial God-questions about sin. "It is finished". Now we're free to tackle the more human questions, and this may be more important.
The toxicity level rises when I cannot stop thinking about how guilty I am. "I am a worm". This is the paralyzing, soul numbing thought that reduces freedom and actually breeds narcissism, shame and self-loathing. I believe that this is the way that the doctrine of sin and depravity has worked its way into the life of the church. Shame is destructive and, I think, only fuels negative behavior.
The subtle shift of thinking about impact instead of guilt is vital. Considering how I am impacting others by my actions or inactions (what I have left undone) might actually help me change and bring healing as I am able to hear and put myself in the shoes of others- becoming aware of the ways I hurt people. Shame traps me in a cycle of hurting others. Understanding my impact and feeling it can break the cycle.
We have impact. There is no escaping that. When you toss a pebble on the water, it breaks the surface and the ripples go out across the lake. You can see the turbulence behind a jet engine as it churns the air around it. Even our very breath goes out and that little turbulence changes the air around us. I step to the side and I push the air and change the environment.
A person may feel that the world would be better off without them, so they exit- withdrawing or worse. But even then they leave a vacuum- a hole where their life was supposed to be. That has impact.
Now thinking that everything you do has an effect may make you feel just as paranoid as guilt does. But even paralysis and passivity are part of the equation. Not doing things because of fear can effect the world as much as doing things can. We confess sins of commission and sins of omission.
But really, why talk about sin at all? Why not just concentrate on grace and being made in the image of God? Well, actually, I think I would like to get there. But there are obstacles.
The first is that sin is there. Things are not the way they are supposed to be. There is an oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. There is a rift between you and your spouse or you and your child. And secondly, I think that considering my impact is a road to real humility and healing.
So...